While sleeping, I realized that I seem to see myself as a very small and insignificant thing, and my helplessness is three times larger than me — therefore there's nothing I can do about it, not until I saw what I am, a colossal figure that is fourteen times larger than my helplessness.
I woke up surprised and shocked. I cannot believe there can be anything larger than my helplessness. Now I understand. The reason I see myself as small is because I'm looking at the mirror of society, defining myself according to social standards and what I think people think about me. After all, can there be anyone smaller than a friendless helpless broke introvert, someone whose existence is so small that even an ant can't notice?
That is me, that is myself from they second-person perspective, from the eyes of someone else. What about myself from the third-person perspective? Then that is myself from the eyes of the universe, someone who is just an another infinitesimal part of the grand universe. Hm I don't really know myself from the first-person perspective, I have never directly seen myself from my own eyes, except when I tried to sleep tonight.
"Who am I?" That is the repeating question of the second self and third self, one that can only be answered by the first self "I am what I am." To live my life from my own eyes, and see the world from the same eyes, is both the easiest and most difficult thing in the world — that is, to live outside what others think and outside what I think. To be honest, it's not something you can think about, it's not a problem to be solved either. It's something everyone knows before they were born. It's the first skill that everyone has already mastered before they came to existence.
It's scary. Because everyone has become accustomed to seeing themselves and the world from the eyes of the second self, the first self appears utterly incomprehensible. After all, what words can ever describe who you really are? What limitations can ever stop you? To be what I am is freedom in its ultimate form, where one stops being separate from emptiness and everything else. Selfishness cannot begin to describe it, for that term assumes a mental distinction between oneself and others. It is beyond selfishness and reason. It is I am.
Confused already? We're just getting started. From what I have observed, it seems to be the first person self who unconsciously controls the second person and the third person self. Thus, there's no use following the quote "be yourself" because you are, in fact, being yourself all along! How surprising!Yes, you heard that right, YOU are the one watching yourself and the world from the eyes of the second person self, YOU are the one who judges yourself from your second person eyes, and YOU can begin to see yourself from the first person anytime you want!
Aaaaaaaaaaa! My head is spinning! What the duck am I writing? What the hell is all of this? Oh no, some readers are probably annoyed with this self-interjections that doesn't add anything important to the article! Guess what?
I'm gonna laugh and end the article right here and then!
AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAKEKEKKEEKKEKEKEKKEKEKEKKEKKEKEKEKAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
(Who would have known that felt better than making a 3000-word perfected article?)