If you can imagine it, then it is possible.
The problem is that I designed my existence to be a multplier. Not just any multiplier, but an exponential multiplier. Naturally, my stats are low and I can't do much by myself. But place me in a team that I can get comfortable with and I'll be able to exponentially multiply their output and sustainability. The problem is making me comfortable. Before anyone can make me comfortable, they have to be comfortable with me first. Me? An idealistic, freedom-oriented person with written communication style, and ridiculous ideas? People would rather much prefer a machine who accepts reality, follows orders, and actually speaks irl.
It would be easier to simply make me a boss or manager of some team. But that would be harder for them in its own way.
I'm really not born to be a solo player.. but it's not like I have a choice in this matter. My original class is a support mage but the circumstances force me to be a magic knight who can barely deal damage. So many people have too few braincells that they only accept tanks, healers, and dps in their party; unable to recognize the importance and uses of other support roles. I'm not lame enough to give in to their stupidity but I do have to survive as a solo player so I'm a magic knight for now.
If only I'm an ultra practical human, I would have already pretended to be a consultant online, faked my credentials, and get rich. Yet that is not the case. Although I can be a little insane at times, I am closer to a Fettered than an Unfettered. Being an idealist is hard, you have to impose additional rules to yourself because you believe in something.. something you cannot prove, something that do not exist yet. As much as possible, I refuse to lie to achieve anything. I believe.. that the truth isn't always ugly, that it can be beautiful enough by itself to attract others without bringing a distorted presentation of reality. If you have to lie or manipulate to get something, then that is simply an skill issue. It's not that bad, it's just I'm too prideful to live in a crude, barbaric way.
Chat, am I cooked? I chose to be a multiplier but I didn't know there's nothing for me to multiply. I chose to be a support mage but there's nothing for me to support. Now I'm simply spending the rest of my days being drunk in mobile games and manwhas. I feel very much like an NPC. Unable to speak or move on its own, waiting to find players who would accept a quest from me.
This is simply too unfortunate. I maxed my stats too much in a few endgame skills that I'm almost useless and can barely survive early game. Though if an endgame player invited me, it would be a different matter. But why would they invite me? They don't need a low level player in their team. This game is too difficult that very few wastes their time and resources to carry low level players either.
It's so annoying that people can ask me a few specific questions or invite me to a few places and I'll be able to use my original class and skills as originally intended. But they don't know that so I'll have to somehow crawl my ass solo and create something I can multiply. Ughh I have no creation or adding skills ffs. My stats are way too low in many areas that it won't be a stretch to think of me as a mute.
Sigh my character build sucks. What was I even thinking that I chose this build? I just soo want to reset already and new game+. But it's annoying that I can still see possibilities. As long as I can see a single possibility, I'll be too greedy to reset. But is that even possible? I have the highest level of possibility generator installed in my mind for some reason.
What I really want.. is not to reset and end this run. Instead, I want to be rich. It is preposterous that someone like me who wasted several weeks being drunk on video games to say this but I'll say it anyway. I want to be rich before the year ends. It's already October. Three months left. Is it difficult? Yes. But is it impossible? No.
Few months ago, I made a wish to get a powerbank before the end of the month. Then suddenly, someone invited me to a gambling app, I played using free coins, and cashed out enough to buy a powerbank. Didn't deposit anything again ever since.
Now, I want to get rich. I only need $2000 for now.
Let's go.
I just had an interesting theory..
I think the pure emotions and instincts of the subself can be used to power the unique abilities of the superself Now that I think about it, my ability isn't probability manipulation as I have initially guessed..
It's actually closer to possibility manifestation the problem is if the normal, rational self is awake, it would naturally interfere with the actions of the subself and superself.
But if it's too overwhelmed by desperate emotions and situations, the rational self would shut down for a moment, giving ample window of opportunity for the subself and superself to interact without supervision.
Just like that time I was wandering in the mall, searching for food because there was no lunch and breakfast, only for me to find a barely eaten meal and pizza on an empty table in a fast food, without any sign of someone there Or that time where I had no money or mobile data, so I roamed outside to get money. I ended up inside a mall, there's actually an election speech on the event center.. I sneaked there and received food and bribe of $10 like hundreds of other people there. And many other examples.
Interestingly, trying to force the ability to activate doesn't seem to work. No amount of mechanical movements can trigger the ability. So repeating the same movements don't get it to work. As long as the rational self is active, the ability won't activate for some reason.
Interestingly, rational self is often absent in fantasy dreams where one dreams of themselves having superpowers. We can thus hypothesize that the "fantasy dream self" is a mental state that seems to he formed by a unity of the superself and subself.
You'll know when the ability is active if you feel an irresistible tingling feeling telling you something, taking you somewhere, except there's no rational thought or inner monologue to observe it.
Therefore, the activation conditions of this ability are:
Even if it could be true, it would be difficult for me to test since that would require being honest with myself. It would require rearranging priorities too. Currently, my priority is to chill and calm down as much as possible. If I try to be productive, the hives would terrorize my skin. If I try to focus on my desires, I might do something impulsive and insane again. Surprisingly, using this ability requires to be something I hate the most: being a weak homo sapien. It would require me to temporarily give up my thinking skills too.