The Tools - Shadow as a Liberator


What happens if you see yourself exposed and vulnerable

Something happens in a group when a person allows himself to truthfully reveal themselves

Naked and unashamed - code for unaware from themselves Eat the apple - now two selves, the observer and observed - they are now ashamed - They judge themselves - hide themselves with fig leaves God asks the first question - where are you? Somewhere by hiding the most vulnerable part of yourself you’re hidden

God can’t reach you until you reveal your shadow; until you expose your shadow

The most important part is the Shadow is a real separate person living inside you. A separate identity. Like an imaginary friend. Real but not a body.

Not as fully noticeable and graspable

You can only know by the faint traces it leaves behind you

Telltale signs you’re close to your shadow - shame , vulnerable, guilt, ashamed, embarrassed... - use those to form your shadow

How the shadow gets made As we grow - we get a sense of what the environment approves of We create the shadow when we push away these parts of us

The shadow is part of the traits that you have disowned

Nobody wants to reveal their shadow

The fact you don’t want to reveal your shadow is a way to identify your shadow - - your secret thoughts, impulses, where - Where you’ve placed your fig leaf

Your shadow is everything you wish you wern’t but are.

The shadow lives in the atmosphere you create in yourself

The work is a reckoning with your shadow:

There’s only one villain in the shadows life and that’s you

Working with the shadow

Look at your life from the shadows POV

What has it been like for the shadow living inside of YOU?

- hiding, shaming it

The relationship starts with empathy (not guilt)

Say- “I know it must be hard

Often the shadow will resist the attempts to connect with it. - - it’s good cause it shows the only way is to show up consistently

There is not just one of you. There are two of you at all times. (This is very difficult to understand.)

If you experience identity as dualistic you’re never really alone

- shadow work is the way through loneliness

Most of our problems are from our forgetting of our shadow

- might experience it in a moment of

    - anxiety

    - Rage

    - Doing something “out of character”

Communicate with your shadow everyday How are you feeling? Is there anything you need for me to do anything today? Is there anything that I shouldn’t do? What do you need?

Sometimes that shadow will communicate back with words or - jokes - Images - Feeling Don’t be surprised at the forms that the shadow communicates

Talk to someone you can talk to someone about your shadow to someone open

Songs that can put you in the shadows mood.

Anger is a secondary emotion from hurt and/or fear.


Boundaries - What other people say / do / feel doesn’t have to affect how you inside. - Having a relationship with someone inside you creates the space and buffer