chapter*Liss
They drank too much. They drank too much. How else can I say it? They drank too much.
———————
How many Bloody Marys does a person need? Two? Three? Five? They drank too much. I’m never drinking that much when I’m old. Never.
———————
I say when you’re sitting in a parking lot and your friend’s daughter is holding your hair out of your face so you don’t get vomit in it—
That you drank too much.
“You drank too much.”
“Thanks, I know.”
“Candycane.”
“You don’t have to do that.” Candy explodes again. “Did you call me Candycane?”
There, there. I pet her back. She’s my little Candycane.
“Hold on one second.” Candycane gets up.
Candycane staggers over to Cock.
She takes a swing at him.
She misses.
She takes off her shoe.
She goes over to Cock’s Escalade.
She puts her shoe through the window of the Escalade.
Cock is waving his hands in the air.
“Hey! Hey! What was that for?”
My dad is holding the bunny helmet.
Cock has the bunny sleeves tied around his waist.
He takes off his Teyva.
He puts it through the other window.
“Is this what we’re doing now? Is this the game? You’re a spoiled bitch..is what you are. You’ve never emphnot had nice things. You’ve never emphnot. You’re a spoiled fucking bitch and you can’t give head.”
“I CAN’T GIVE HEAD?! emphI CAN’t GIVE HEAemphD?? Who the fuck are we talking about that can’t give head?”
Candy goes to my dad.
“This motherfucker. That motherfucker right there. Do you know how long it takes this motherfucker to cum?”
Cock has off his other Teyva. He launches it across the parking lot.
“This motherfucker. First day I met him. Sucked his cock for half an hour.”
“All I wanted to do was take you home.”
“Sucked his fucking cock for half an hour!”
“She had on this crazytight little dress. Why don’t you wear that dress anymore?”
“Because you fucking ripped it.”
“Oh yeah, that’s right.”
“I don’t think you ever even came the first time we had sex together.”
“No—wait—no I didn’t.”
“Takes this motherfucker emphforever to cum.”
“Baby. Look what you did to my car.”
“Look what you fucking did to it.”
“I wanna leave you right here.”
Cock is shaking his head.
“I wanna leave you right here. You know that? Just to show you that you don’t break people’s nice things. You don’t have a job, so you don’t know about that.”
“I have a job!”
“Candy, I’m talking about a real job. You sit up at Sharks drinking drinks with this motherfucker. That’s not a real job. This motherfucker—” (He means my dad.) “—this motherfucker has a real job. You don’t know what it’s like to emphhave a real job cause you’ve never emphhad a real job.”
Candy’s kicking the side of the Escalade.
“How about that?” she says.
How about it.
“Liss, come’ere. Help me tear this motherfucker’s shit apart.”
“Leave you right here.”
I’m looking at my dad. Can I?
“Go ahead!” Cock says. “If it’s okay with you.”
Dad motions to the Escalade.
“Come’ere Liss. Let’s have a girl party.”
“Oh yeah, that’s some girl party!”
Candy digs her ring into the side of the Escalade.
“Oh! That’s fucking great! This bitch is one in a million. I emphbought you that fucking ring!”
My dad is laughing.
Candy takes off the ring and gives it to me. “Scratch it.”
I look at my dad.
“Don’t lose it.”
“Candy. What the fuck. Why’d you take off that ring.”
“Because I don’t love you anymore.”
“Candy, get in the car. Can we please just fucking emphgo? Look. The sun is setting. Look, see. It’s almost dark. Liss wants to go swimming—” Cock is bouncing up and down “—before dark! You’re messing up a little girl’s fun. Fucking girl party.”
“Give me that.” Candy takes the ring.
“You still want to go swimming?” Cock asks my dad. “Or is this whole thing..ruined?”
Then Candy cocks back and she throws the ring across the parking lot.
The bunny is mortified.
emphLapin mort.
The bunny is speechless.
He and my dad are looking at each other.
“Well,” my dad says, smiling. “Let’s go.”
———————
This is us driving around the parking lot in Cock’s busted Escalade.
———————
This is Candy getting out of the car.
———————
Cock doesn’t speak the entire time.
———————
My dad and I sit in the back seat.
begincenter—illustration: SHARK!, in a bowl—or jumping out of one!, sits next to Liss—endcenternoindent
Candy finally finds it.
———————
“It’s dark now. See? It’s dark. You’re messing up Liss’s fun.” But they didn’t mess up my fun. I like swimming in the dark, too. Cock’s house is amazing. It has statues in the front. One is broken.
———————
“We broke that last week. Me and Mega Cock. We almost lit the house on fire.” Cock’s living room has a pool table. There’s a bar. The house has hardly any furniture. There’s a giant TV. The living room opens onto the pool. “Mega Cock!! Are you here? Becca?” Cock opens the refrigerator. The only thing in it is beer. “Y’all want something to drink?” But I’m out with the pool. I sit on the edge. The pool looks over the top side of Los Angeles. It’s a vista.
begincenter—illustration: SHARK! swims freely in the pool—endcenternoindent
If Winnie were here she would love it. I take a picture.
———————
You can see everything. You can see so far. You can almost see to the ocean. You can see where the lights stop.
And inbetween. Inbetween. So many lights. So many people. And everyone’s doing their thing. Everyone’s in their little houses, watching TV. That’s where all those shows get watched. That’s why there’s so many Starbucks. All those people. All those lights. Quiet night. Simple night. Night by the pool. Blue light. Ripples. I put my feet in. My shoes are in the Escalade.
Tickle my toes, tickle my toes. I’m breathing. I can move my fingers. Some people are stuck in beds in hospitals. Some people are locked in. I can move my toes, can feel them. I can lick my hair. I don’t mind the wind. It blows my hair into my mouth. But some people can’t even do that. Some people can’t lick their hair. The inventor of Pilates, Joesph, was sick as a child. Tickle my toes. Wave them back and forth.
Inside the house, there’s my dad and Cock and Candy. They’re doing shots. Naturally.
———————
This is how they do them: Candy gets on Cock’s back. Cock is pouring the shots. Cock knocks over a statue. He is motioning to Dad. Dad climbs up on Candy. Candy grabs the bunny hat. She puts it on my dad. Dad lifts it up to do his shot. Candy’s hand is on my dad. Cock almost falls over. Cock hands Candy a glass. Candy drinks it. Then. The bunny staggers. Candy grabs my Dad. Dad is falling back. His arm catches on a statue. The statue breaks. Bunny falling. Candy falling. All of them in a puddle on the kitchen floor. Arms reaching out to grab things. Pieces of statue. A glass. Cock is slapping my dad. My dad is slapping him back. They’re slapping each other’s faces. They’re both red. They’re not angry. They’re slapping each other’s faces. In joy. I suppose. I guess it’s joy. Candy jumps up and does a pile driver on her boyfriend. She slams her elbow into him. He’s reeling. Candy kicks my dad. My dad falls back. His head hits a statue. Then my dad takes it. He takes the statue. He lifts it over his head. He’s standing. Candybunny is below him. My dad lifts this statue—it’s one of those Greek-looking guys—he lifts the statue. Candy has her hand up. Guarding. Terror. Like how you would look right before Pompeii. Lava floating down on you. Holding that hand up like it’s going to stop it. A river of lava. A mountain. And at that last minute, you throw your hands out in front of your face. Like that’s going to stop it. Dad lifts the statue. Cock is laughing. He’s laughing. That bunny is laughing. He’s asking my dad to drop it. To break his statue. He wants it. The bunny wants to be crushed. So does Penny Candy. That’s all she is. A little piece of penny candy. I know she’s planning something with my dad. After Cock falls asleep. She’s going to drug him. Drug her cock. Put him out. Then she’s going to do something with my dad. You can never trust a piece of penny candy. She’s nothing but a penny. Candy’s looking at him emphlike that. Lying back in Cock’s arms, but she’s got that look. Horrible piece of penny candy. Those stupid shorts. I hate cutoffs. And Cock is a bad bunny; what’s his real name? I don’t trust someone who goes by the name of “Cock”. Why does he do that? Is he trying to be a man? His hand is on his Candy. It’s giant. He holds her like a racket. And who’s that other man in there, that man they call my dad. Who’s holding the statue. This is what they do for fun. And Cock is begging for it, he’s saying it, he’s telling my dad to do it. I should pre-call the ambulance. “Hello? Hi. Yes. There’s a bunny here got a statue broke over his head. Come quick.”