I did say that I'll gamble time. But how exactly do I use it to gamble? And what will I gamble it for?
Money, of course. I need wifi. The lack of wifi in this modern world feels as if your oxygen intake got cut in half.
But there's no GUI or guide to gamble time for money. They're all.. suggestions. Mostly bad ones. If we're seriously doing this, then we need something else other than time. A catalytic agent. That will be.. creativity.
Yet creativity itself requires clarity.. and clarity requires attention span.. that I do not have. My head feels cooked and lightheaded from waking up late, doom scrolling, and playing two idle games at the same time.
I need to check my idle game every hour. So this stupid player won't surpass me. They even woke up early this morning just to surpass me. Now there's only one small gap between us. I won't let them.
Wfh and beermoney are obviously poor gambles. Their only appeal is their social validity and sense of belonging, of doing things the correct way. It may look like an alternative, but no it's just an obvious trap set by the mainstream to cook those who are looking to be alternative.
I.. need to actually think. To seriously think. I just realized that the deep pit in the cave filled with trash may actually be a disguised entrance to an underground something. No one would ever suspect anything. But if it's an entrance, how do you go inside? I can think of two things.. a hidden wall button or a hidden trapdoor. For the hidden hatch, you need to extend your hands inside the trash and pull/push something.
The world is full of mysteries. But these mysteries cannot be perceived by those walking in the main road. They can only be found by those who are wandering around or those who are thrown in the middle of nowhere.
These are the Lost. Eventually, they build their own community hidden from prying eyes. Let's call this the Shadows. Not every Lost reaches the Shadows, most of them die before reaching it.
Basically, I need to gamble my time looking for Treasures and Shadows. Additionally, I need to find and interview a Lost for more information.
Poverty is not as impenetrable as society makes it appear to be. It's simply another puzzle, another equation to be solved. The problem with aging is that it makes one feel that the universe is already full, as if there's nothing more to be seen or learned. No. Everything I have learned and experienced isn't even a quarter of the observable world. Create new patterns and take new routes, there's plenty of truths that reside in the dark, in the fun, and in the mundane, not just in the popular and the painful.
That feeling. As if I have written this before to no avail. Will it remain the same this time? How far can I go? How far will I go?
One thing is for sure. I'm going to lose again if I take this too seriously.
I may not be able to actually escape this condition. At least I must enjoy the process. I may not be able to enjoy the process all the time. But at least I'll remain calm enough to understand it. I may not be able to remain calm all the time, but I shall persist long enough to see all of it.