Today, April 28, 2022, is one day before I will turn 20 years old. Tomorrow, I'm going to become a fully matured adult male, where I'll have to participate in real world matters whether I like it or not.
I want some more time and rest some more, but the plan continues. Tomorrow, I'll transform into a new person, no — I'll just become myself, my true self. No matter what changes happen to me, the one I see on the mirror is still my 7-year old self, a random stupid and ignorant kid.
I will proudly show, that I have changed, yet still, I'm still the same person I was before. Yes, that's right, I am the same clumsy and ignorant kid 13 years ago. I am the same person who cried about stupid things and stumbled on my bike many times.
Looks like it's about to begin. No more extensions or excuses. No more running away or hiding, for my life journey is about to begin.
Too bad, I was planning to learn some superpowers before I reached this stage. Guess I'll just learn it later. Here's the latest things I learned recently, that will culminate in my metamorphosis tomorrow.
The great thing about this world is that everything will still fall into the same place whether I failed, do nothing, or do something, so there's no reason for us to do nothing or be afraid of failure. It's all the same in the end. There's no pressure to live perfectly, nor any expectations to move smoothly.
There's no such thing as Moderation, for the light and the dark never compromise nor fight each other in the first place. The Yin and the Yang is the closest symbol to perfection and moderation we can ever have.
It symbolizes that the dark and the light are united as one, that they are simply two sides of the same coin. The light creates the shadows and the darkness prepares the way for the light. The best thing we can do is to accept them both, without bias nor prejudice.
I accept my fate. I accept this life. I accept this world. I accept myself. I accept the existence of everyone else. I accept all the experiences I had and every experience that will come to me. Let them come, let myself come. There's no going back.
I have determined that my main skill in life is Focus, my sheer focus to complete my tasks, achieve my dreams, and stick to my values. These days, I have amplified my focus that I'm able to instantly shift my focus to the present moment or to a part of my body.
This is probably due to the amount of time I have spent training my Zetsu, focusing on my senses most of the time and accepting everything I see, without necessarily believing nor acting on it.
Today, I can now amplify my focus up to twelve times using the following mind skills:
I have learned that there's no need for me to take life too seriously, or it will result in lots of self-criticism or burnout. Taking life too lightly will result in breaking the structure of my life.
The answer here then, is Focus. To focus on the things you want, improve on your mistakes, but not criticize yourself for it.
As part of the series on Aura Control, I have learned my personal Hatsu skills that reflects my personality and character. It seems to me that I have been using them all along. My mind skills are just as effective as supernatural materialization skills, and they are the ways I express my life force energy.
I don't need to have Hatsu materialization powers, like get some elemental powers or stuff. I accept my own Hatsu skills and I'm satisfied with them. It seems that my Aura Type is Manipulation, whose users tend to be argumentative and logical, but doesn't like lying.
It makes sense then, that my Hatsu skills are mostly focused on manipulating and changing my own mental states with my mind skills, and also changing other people's mental states with my psychosocial skills. Basically, my main Hatsu is about manipulating mental states.
Interestingly, under certain conditions, it would seem that I am able to manipulate possibilities and fate as well. Though I don't exactly know what conditions they are. In the instances that I managed to do them, I have observed the following things:
I will now describe the exact emotions and feelings I experience when the skill activation goes well.
I was desperate and tired, wishing that something would happen, while sitting kna school chair. I daydreamed about something and believed it would happen. Suddenly my stomach feels so excited and my mind completely confirmed that it's true. I immediately ran to the exact location of my daydream/vision and it happened exactly the way I imagined it to.
I was tired and annoyed, the rain was so hard and I still haven't got home. Despite all the painful and tiring experience, I silently prayed, that I could at least see someone, for even a few seconds, so that my day would have at least some meaning. I wasn't expecting much, but I really believed that it would happen. Suddenly, that person appeared few inches beside me! HOLY SHI-
These instant miracles couldn't be possibly coincidences. You can't predict coincidences, and the possibility that they would happen is extremely rare. Thus, we can say that I somehow have this ability, though I don't really know it's extent nor how to use it.
One thing in common out of all of them is the complete suspension of disbelief, believing that it would happen no matter what. I'm also in a very emotional, tired, and half-conscious state when those stuff happened.
So yeah, this skills are perfectly applicable for the metamorphosis that's about to happen to me tomorrow. I have completed the build-up and foreshadowing, the only thing I need to do for tomorrow is to jump the gun and pull the trigger.
Oh and I can also use these skills to form another therapeutic method, I call it "FACT" — Focus, Acceptance, and Commitment Therapy. As you can see, it combines with the original ACT, but there's the additional "Focus" part which means more mindfulness and concentration.
Like I said, there's no need for me to do much. I just have to finally wake up from my super late slumber and actually start living. I just have to stop hiding and come out, because I have realized that the monster I'm afraid of, is actually myself, and not anyone else.
Basically I will just have to remove the lock on this following areas of my life, using the new skills I learned above.
An hour of meditation or two will suffice to completely unlock these seals and finish the metamorphosis.
Tomorrow, I will leave my cocoon and transform into my true form. Fear not, for I won't ravage the lands and make it rain hellfire on this world, but rather, my voice shall be as gentle as the wind, my eyes shall burn with determination, and my resolve shall be tougher than diamond.
Too bad, I want to sleep some more, but it seems I can no longer sleep. The sun is already high up in the sky and my people are calling me. I must go.
The observation and the planning phase has officially ended. Next, we will now proceed to execution and action phase. Let the raindrops fall, let the boulders roll, there's no need for us to stop them anyway.
Whatever I do or don't do, the plan of the universe will proceed. Everything will fall to their proper place. Everything is part of the plan.
If that's the case, why not live and have fun?
"Something happens to children at four years old — they gain consciousness. The same thing happens to people at twenty years old — they choose the path they want to walk on."
"Unseal thyself. Only you can release yourself from your own suffering."
"Playtime is over."